Matchman's Grand (Old) Adventures

Time for a 'fact hunt'.

Melbourne is the capital of Victoria and has traditionally been Sydney's rival for biggest/best city in Australia. It is currently the second most populous city in Australia with just under 5 million people, and by coincidence Victoria is the second most populous state, behind New South Wales. 70% of Victorians live in Melbourne.

When Australia decided it needed a capital city & state, Melbourne and Sydney went at loggerheads to get the vote. The compromise was to build an entirely new city and state, namely Canberra/Australian Capital Territory, which was to be developed half way between the two rival cities. Melbourne was chosen as the interim capital whilst the development took place.

Although some people prefer life in Melbourne to Sydney, it's generally an accepted fact that Sydney has become Australia's main city in the last 50 years or so, particularly with the iconic Harbour Bridge and Opera House. Recent projections suggest that Melbourne might once again overtake Sydney in terms of population in the next 20 years or so.

Melbourne is famous for its changeable weather conditions, as in the song '4 Seasons In One Day'. This is brought about by a combination of the Dandenong Ranges to the east, it's position on the Port Phillip Bay and the flatness of the land, resulting in weather that sometimes circles the city. The result is a tendency for very hot and humid conditions and quite a bit of rain, which isn't really my cup of tea climate-wise. In the summer of 1939 the temperature in Melbourne reached almost 46 degrees. Ouch.

My first impressions of Melbourne are that this would be a great place to live. A nice, compact city centre with parks and attractions around, trams and trains for easy transportation, and a nice cultural atmosphere with cool little bars and restaurants scattered about down the side streets. Unfortunately I'm quite fussy about my weather and I couldn't see myself living in Melbourne long term. There also aren't many beaches about, and the ones that are here are quite small and congested. Just my opinion of course, I can imagine a lot of people would love it here. And it is a very nice place.

As the weather in Melbourne has been miserable the last few days we've spent our time trying to find things to do. This has proved to be more difficult than first anticipated, and has led to a lot of frustration and a few arguments, mostly about which pub we're going to waste the day away in. Apparently Melbourne has more to do than Sydney, however that's really not of much use to someone who hasn't got a clue where anything is. Most things are classified as 'hidden secrets' - great, fantastic, we'll just spend our time walking up and down the streets not finding anything and getting very hungry and thirsty.

Anyway, rant over, the weather has been okay for the last couple of days and we've seen a bit more of the city. On Friday we went to the Australian Open tennis, cheap seats only at $29 - the main Rod Laver tickets were $80 and there weren't any really good matches on - so we settled down and watched some lesser known players in the second/third rounds. I really enjoyed it, decent tennis up close is good viewing, especially the mixed doubles afterwards which was light-hearted and entertaining. We tried to get in to see the Williams sisters in the womens doubles but unfortunately everyone else had the same idea and it was full when we reached the court. Never mind, I thought it was good value for money and the sun even shone for us, which is seemingly a miracle for Melbourne.

Yesterday we went to the Royal Botanical Gardens - very similiar to Sydney's version but without the Opera House and Harbour Bridge in the background - and then went up the Eureka Tower for some dizzy panoramic views of the city. All good stuff. The Edge was fairly harrowing, you step out on the 88th floor and then the glass floor clears below, allowing you to see the ground below.

Today we did the Neighbours tour, our hostel lied to us and said we'd be able to go on Ramsay Street but when we got there they were filming and we had to stay out. We met Karl Kennedy and some kid, which wasn't particularly exciting, and got to watch the Ramsay Street Olympics episode from 1986 on the bus. Does that sound worthy of almost 20 pounds to you? I'll leave you to decide.

In between all of this we've been plotting our trip to Tasmania which starts on the 25th. Five action packed days of adventure, beautiful views and feeding kangaroos and Tasmanian Devils. I can't wait. The weather looks good too, I hope it holds up!! Bye for now, thanks for reading...once again I hope everyone's okay back home, I hear there's been a lot of rain? That sucks, but brings a smile to my face too. Sorry...

Okay, my old entries from etraveldiary are too long to fit in here so I've had to truncate this a bit - I've removed the beginning where I did a day by day update to fit it all in!!

Good News

On Wednesday I had it confirmed by the hostel that they'd let me stay there over Christmas and New Year, even if it meant me sleeping on the couch. Problem was, they wanted $115 dollars a night over the period - like I said before, they're all jacking their prices up.

But things are looking up, for several reasons.

Firstly, I had a splendid night out on Friday with Dan Fish who, may I say, is my favourite person in the world right now. By a distance. Aside from being a thoroughly decent chap as always, he's managed to swing some accommodation my way in the form of an empty flat on Bondi Beach that his friends own - they're away during the period. And it's free. Wow, what a result. I've got work to do to repay that favour. I worked out that it's saving me over $1,000 as well as being a nicer place and in Bondi, where I wanted to be at Christmas anyway.

Secondly, I've been given a taster for the weather to come once the current low disappears. Two days of glorious weather with clear blue skies, 30 degrees on Saturday with a gentle breeze. Nice. Back to cloudy again today but that nice weather is forecast for the whole of January and February. I can't wait.

I'm going to Dan and Holly's wedding in January. Should be a cracker, hopefully the weather will be up to scratch. I need to find myself a 60s/70s Latin outfit - if anyone has any ideas what that should be and where to get it, let me know!!

Some random pictures uploaded here of the Kings Cross and Woolloomooloo area, I've not been taking my camera out much the last few days. At the bottom of those steps above lies the infamous Harry's Cafe De Wheels, which has been running since 1940. Every person and guidebook recommends you try their food - it was nice enough but I have a feeling that they get a lot of their business from tourists who've been told to go there, rather than for simply serving great food. Apparently on a busy evening they sell 2,000 pies which is impressive, particularly for what is basically a small shack on the pavement. They certainly have slick service, the food arrives pretty much as soon as you've finished your order - grab a pie and slap a piece of mash on top.

An update on my travel plans - I intend to go to Melbourne in January and then onto Perth in February. Those two flights I already have booked, I just need to confirm dates and move them both. I then need to come back to Sydney for mid-March and stay until late April to meet people (you know who you are), and then I'll go up the East coast to Cairns as it'll be dry season. After that, time to look for some work.

Also, a quick booze update - as recommended by Dan and his mate, Coopers Pale Ale is my favourite tipple so far. Not the strongest beer in the world (4.5%) but you can drink it all night and not get a headache or a bad taste in your mouth. It's brewed in South Australia and the company is Australia's only family owned brewery. Far, far nicer than those crappy VB and Tooheys offerings.

Until next time...

Seasons Greetings!

Happy Christmas everyone, enjoy all your presents and have a good one in the Bells, you know who you are.

I've now left the Blue Parrot Backpackers and have moved into Dan Fish's friends flat as they've gone to Bali for 2 weeks. It's a nice little flat in North Bondi, 5 minutes walk from the beach, and is already a welcome break from the hostel life. No doubt in 2 weeks I'll be looking forward to going back into a hostel though.

The weather is still crap in Sydney, yesterday was a gorgeous sunny day but the storms have immediately returned with a vengeance. Some things on the horizon:

- Christmas Day at Bondi Beach
- Horse Racing on Boxing Day (if I go and get a suit today)
- New Years Eve at Sydney Harbour
- First day of the Australia v India test match on the 2nd
- Dan and Holly's wedding on the 5th (still need to get my outfit, it'll be in the style of Al Pacino in Scarface)

Having done Kings Cross already I might look to go somewhere else in Sydney after I leave Bondi, possibly Manly for a week or two and then it'll be onto Melbourne. Of course I'm back in Sydney in March so I don't have to see the whole of the city yet.

Went to the Chinese Gardens the other day, which was okay, but on the way back we stopped in to watch a free 'Sounds of the Outback' show where a guy played the Didgeridoo and told a few facts about it:

- The name was apparently coined by Charles Darwin after he noticed that the sound an Aborigine was creating from it sounded like Didg-errr-eeee-dooo, although this is disputed.
- Didgeridoos are actually just Eucalyptus branches that have been hollowed out by termites.
- They were only found in the northern territories of Australia.
- It's believed that Aborigines have been playing the Didgeridoo for 1,500 years.
- Circular breathing is required to play one sustained, i.e. breath through your nose while expelling air. It's not easy.
- The instruments were used to tell stories about animals to the younger members of the tribes, describing crocodiles, snakes, spiders, dingos and kangaroos amongst others. The players would use their spare hand to make the movement of the animals.

Okay that'll do, once again Happy Christmas everyone, get stuffed and all that, and I'll be back before New Year!

Christmas Update

Good Christmas everyone? I hope so. I tried to get through to quite a lot of people on Christmas Eve without any joy, problems with my Vodafone signal unfortunately, and then I ran out of credit on Boxing Day.

It's getting quite hard to remember what's gone on since the last update so I'll just talk about Christmas and Boxing Day. Christmas Eve was a big piss up in Bondi Junction at the Cock & Bull followed by the Tea Gardens. Two fairly scummy Irish pubs, both absolutely heaving and full of lairy people. Just not the same as the Bells eh. Got hammered on cheap vodka, decided to go out for a cigarette in the Tea Gardens and then the bouncer wouldn't let me back in for being too drunk.

The bouncers in Australia, or at least Sydney, are rude and jobsworthy beyond belief. If you lean against a wall outside in the blistering heat you're deemed too drunk to come in, and they'll quite happily tell people to walk down the road and back again as a 'test', whereas of course they're just having a laugh. It really is very annoying indeed.

Anyway, we were back on it on Christmas Day very early and it was down to the Swiss Grand on Bondi Beach for our Christmas Day meal which we'd paid $150 each for (that's about 60 quid). All you can eat food and free drinks for three and a half hours. Unfortunately the girls and consequently all of us were late, the staff were rude and the food was either shit or just not there at all. I ended up with a plate of fishy stuff which I picked at and then got a plate of turkey, eventually followed by a plate of potatoes when they were finally brought out.

The weather was really bad on Christmas Day, very windy especially by the beach, so we went back to the flat and had a little gathering there which was actually fairly Christmassy, lots of booze, games and silly hats. People dispanded at about 1am ready for a big Boxing Day at the races.

And so it was onwards to International Day at Royal Randwick race course, free entry for anyone with a foreign passport. I stuck on the suit that I bought for Dan and Holly's wedding and we got cracking again, Champagne and vodka all day in what can only be described as glorious weather - too hot for a suit of course but I wasn't complaining. I went for out and out winners in all the races and one of them came in big to leave me about even for the day, although well down on booze money which wasn't exactly cheap. Onto Coogie afterwards for more drinks and then back to Bondi again for some well-earned sleep.

Apart from New Years Eve I expect the next few days to be slow, everyone's shattered and the weather's nice so a few days at the beach might be in order while we work out what we're going to do. Would be good to hear what people are up to themselves, don't be strangers!! Have a good one and speak soon.

A New Year Down Under

Happy New Year everyone! Hopefully everyone had a good time and made the most of it with work looming...

The celebrations in Sydney were awesome, they know how to put on a show over here. I've no idea how to take pictures of fireworks on my camera, as you can see, so I stole a picture of Google to show what they were like. We definitely made the right choice in getting to a park, so much better than forking out for some busy pub or club and sweating it up all night. Just to rub it in, the weather was unbelievably good too...clear blue skies, about 30 degrees with a refreshing wind. Nice. After the fireworks at 12 we went down to Bondi Beach and hung around outside the Groove Armada show for a while, then passed out just before 4am.

Playing golf today in Bondi, then tomorrow it's off to the SCG for the third day of the Australia v India test match. And immediately after that I'll be bidding a fond farewell to Dan & George's flat and moving into a hostel in Coogee for 3 nights. On Saturday I'll be donning the suit again for Dan & Holly's wedding, which I'm really looking forward to, and then on Monday it's...ROAD TRIP!!

Four of us are off to the Blue Mountains in a campervan for 5 days. It's about a 3 hour drive from Sydney, and because it's a 5 day minimum hire we'll probably head down to Jervis Bay for a few days. Awesome times...I just hope the weather holds up, apparently the clouds are on their way back next week. Boooooo.

Take it easy everyone...and good luck in 2008!!

Big Update

Lots to report!

First up was the cricket on the 4th at the SCG, Australia v India. A really hot day and there's very little breeze to be found in a cricket ground - we ended up peeling ourselves off our chairs to leave. India batted for most of the day and although they eventually lost the test match it was certainly their day. Sachin Tendulkar racked up yet another 150, coming into the match with an average of over 250 at the SCG. A good day but I'm looking forward to the 20-20 match in Melbourne even more.

Then it was out of the flat and off to Coogee to stay at the Surfside hostel, which I'm pleased to report is a dump full of cockroaches and unruly louts, with little or no security in the rooms. Thank god it was only for 3 nights.

On Saturday I went to Dan & Holly's wedding at Hyde Park, on Macquarie Street to be precise, in front of lots of people with a very long red carpet leading up to the stage - the longest in the Southern Hemisphere apparently!! It was a fabulous do, three couples got married, presumably each one representing different aspects of Australian life. Dan & Holly are of course from overseas, the second couple were fairly typical outgoing young Australians from Queensland renewing their vows, and the third couple represented Australia's gay community. Each one had a different theme and a spectacular entrance, Dan's was to ride down the red carpet on a motorbike. I can't remember a wedding going so quickly, especially considering I didn't even know who the two other couples were. Then it was off for free drinks in the massive VIP German tent on Hyde Park along with the speeches. Highlight of the night - Dan's face when the organisers announced that each couple had been given a free cruise worth $11,000 each!! Quality.

Last but not least - Roadtrip! Me, Dave, Ashley and Jamie hired a 4 berth campervan from Britz and set off the Blue Mountains on Monday, quickly followed by a drive down to Jervis Bay on Tuesday afternoon where we stayed until Friday morning. Every day was awesome in its own way - the Blue Mountains are something to behold, especially on a clear day like Monday; the drive to Jervis Bay down the Grand Pacific road was breathtaking at times; the whitest beach in the world at Hyams Beach, the waves at Cave Beach, the emptiness of Bherwerre Beach, and the sheer scale of Seven Mile Beach. And all of these spots are nearly empty, you can just do whatever you like on them. Compared with the likes of Waikiki and Bondi, there's no contest at all. Entirely different worlds.

A quick word on something amazing on Tuesday night in Sanctuary Point near Jervis Bay, which is where our campsite was. We left the van at about 8pm to hunt down the local social club (the only place in walking distance) and encountered something quite unexpected. A large black dog was chasing something up the road towards us, and cornered it in someone's front garden. But then it backed off and stood its ground, just growling rather than barking. In front of it, standing on its rear legs and puffing its chest out at the dog was a rather large and menacing looking kangaroo, which had clearly had enough of being chased by the dog. Wow!! Unfortunately I didn't have a camera to take a picture of it, but it was really amazing. My first kangaroo sighting, and what a spectacle!! Eventually the dogs owner came to get it, no doubt to save the dog rather than the kangaroo!! At that point we decided to make a retreat as the 'roo was probably a little bit annoyed.

So, the first Oz Roadtrip is now over and I'm pleased to report that it was great fun, if not a little bit uncomfortable to sleep in the van. For now I've got a few days left in Sydney and then it's off to Melbourne on Thursday to visit the land of Neighbours and such like. Excellent. Bye everyone, speak soon.

So Long Sydney...

So long Sydney...it's been a ball but time to move on. Melbourne is the next port of call, in fact I've just arrived, but I'll be back in Sydney later.

Since the Road Trip the weather in Sydney has been a bit up and down, quite frustrating at times, and so activities have been a bit varied. On Friday night we picked up some kangaroo steaks from the butchers opposite and they were DELICIOUS. The best steaks I've ever eaten, as good as a fillet steak but WAY cheaper.

On Saturday I went to Newtown to meet Lynn B's friend Lucy for her birthday drinks, and then on Sunday we went to the Bourbon Bar in Kings Cross and randomly met some of the Beach Cricket crew who had been spread out around the city to meet the public. I met Gladstone Small, John Emburey, Darren Lehmann, Michael Bevan, Chris Cairns and Sir Richard Hadlee. It was certainly interesting being asked if we wanted a beer by a knight of the realm, and then practically ordering him to bring us another jug.

On Monday most of the crew left for Melbourne and I was left to explore whatever else I could in the 3 days I had left. Monday was a stinker of a day so I didn't achieve much but on Tuesday I went to the Australian Museum to see the Wildlife Photographer of the Year exhibition, which was awesome, and then went to Taronga Zoo in the afternoon, which was even better (you'd hope so as it was 4 times as expensive). And then on Monday I visited the last remaining suburb of Sydney on my to-do list, namely Manly, which was certainly very nice. Unfortunately having been to Jervis Bay all beaches seem to be a bit of a letdown, but I can safely say it's nicer than Bondi.

So, that's Sydney Part One done and dusted, now I have a week in Melbourne before flying off to Tasmania for 5 days which I'm looking forward to. I'm off down the pub in a moment as that's all there seems to be to do around here. Tennis tomorrow, and then a Ramsay Street trip next week before heading off to Hobart. Nice.

I trust everyone's well and enjoying life, I certainly am, I'm going to check out Melbourne and then I'll be back with an update.

Day 1

First of all, a few facts I learnt from my time in San Francisco.

- The San Francisco 49ers are named after the moguls who came to the city in the Gold Rush after it was discovered there in 1848, turning it into a boomtown.
- If you're standing on flat land in San Francisco, it's likely you're on landfill. Many people have bought waterside properties only to watch more landfill extend the bay and push their homes further away.
- The exclusive district of San Francisco, Nob Hill, is short for Nobility Hill. It's also known as Snob Hill by the locals.
- If you buy a boat, you're not going to be able to keep it in San Francisco. All the private moorings are fully booked for the next 25 years.
- The Transamerica Pyramid was specifically positioned and designed so that the executives in the nearby Bank of America building would have to look up to it from their top floor offices.
- George Moscone, a former mayor of San Francisco, campaigned against the creation of a convention centre as it would displace too many people from their homes. After he was assassinated the city went ahead and built one anyway and cheekily named it after him.
- The Beefeater doorman at the Sir Francis Drake hotel, Tom Sweeney, has shaken the hand of every president since 1979 as they have all stayed there, with the exception of George Dubya for whom he had to travel to San Jose to greet. That's a lot of effort to meet such an imbecile.

Onto Hawaii. Up before dawn for another crappy American Airlines flight which took five and a half hours, longer than advertised, and full of screaming babies that gave me a headache. They really should be banned. Arrived in Honolulu at 1pm and BOOM, severe humidity despite totally overcast conditions. Off with the coat.

The good thing about tourist traps like Waikiki is that as more and more top hotels are built other hotels have to lower their prices to attract guests. Which I can only imagine is what has happened to mine, the Aqua Palms & Spa hotel. Call me common but I reckon you know you're staying somewhere classy when you're presented in your room with not one but a choice of different coloured dressing gowns to wear. Oh yeah. I'd turned down an ocean view when I booked it to save money and was still given one anyway, which was a bonus (don't confuse ocean view with ocean front - a view means you can only see a bit of the ocean).

I strolled about for a while with a map to get my bearings, then decided I needed to get a little bit of sleep. I laid down on my bed and before 6pm I'd fallen asleep, hoping to get a few hours kip, and then woke up at 7am the next morning. I guess I was tired.

Day 2

Did you know that to the west of O'ahu lies a small island called Ni'ihau where there's no electricity and nobody speaks English? Neither did I. It doesn't even appear on a lot of maps of Hawaii. The reason it's not well known is that you can only live on the island if you're 100% Hawaiian blood, and only 160 people live there.

The Hawaiian blood system is intriguing and I can't help but think the UK would be much better off with something similar. For example, if you're 50% Hawaiian blood or more you can qualify for free medical care. The same applies to children who go to the top private schools. I like this system a lot.

Anyway, back to business. Refreshed after my monster sleep I looked out of my window to be greeted by a lavish storm. Great. Having missed dinner last night I was ravenous so I braved the rain and walked into the Chinese all-you-can-eat buffet restaurant next door to the hotel, then ran over to the Hilton opposite to use their internet access. Note to self - find somewhere cheaper.

By the time I'd finished the rain had stopped and I strolled down Kalakaua Avenue, the main street in Waikiki. Unsurprisingly it's tourist central - lots of Chinese and Japanese people taking pictures of each other in front of overpriced Louis Vuitton and Prada shops. I had a look around some of the shopping centres and ended up with some sandals and Hawaiian shorts. Nice. Back to the hotel to transform into a surf dude and then down to Waikiki Beach.

It was pretty empty, unsurprising I guess given the overcast weather and high winds. Not even many surfers about. I people watched for a while and then retreated to the hotel as some dangerous looking clouds came in - I didn't make it in time.

The heavens opened and I got soaked. And it didn't let up all night - rainy season indeed. I had to go back to the Chinese restaurant again as it was the only place in spitting distance, then back to the hotel where I sat penned in watching crap TV.

Day 3

Early start today, I was picked up at 6am by a shuttle bus to go to Pearl Harbour. Lots of fannying about with different hotels and then a final switch onto a different bus. I was looking forward to the visit, but not as much as the two elderly American chaps behind me with their Pearl Harbour caps on.

Aside from still being a US navy port, Pearl Harbour is split into three main parts - a museum with memorabilia and exhibits; a former WWII submarine called the USS Bowfin; and a memorial to the biggest casualty of the Pearl Harbour attack, the USS Arizona.

The museum was decent enough, I particularly liked the real exhibits near the Bowfin as you can play on the gun turrets and try out the periscopes. It's also worth noting how big the missiles and torpedoes are from the sub, absolutely massive. Unfortunately I didn't have enough time to queue up and walk on the sub.

The Arizona memorial starts with a fairly moving 30 minute video with real footage of the Japanese attack (the guy next to me was in tears). Then you take a boat out to the spot where the Arizona still lies, with a small white memorial building above it.

1,177 people died on the Arizona, accounting for almost half the casualties in the attack. The bomb that hit it actually landed in the ammunition bay and set off thousands of pounds of gunpowder. The resulting blast sent the 20,000 pound anchor 100 feet away and also launched one of the gun turrets way into the air, creating a second blast when it landed. The ship sank in 9 minutes, taking 80% of the crew with it.

It's a sobering thought to stand on the memorial, with bits of the boat sticking out of the water, and learn that almost 900 bodies still lie entombed in the boat directly beneath you, as yet unreachable to the salvage teams.

A quick note to temper the memorial. The USS Bowfin, displayed as a gallant US submarine and accessible to the public in Pearl Harbour, sank the unmarked Tsushima Maru in 1944. 1,484 civilians were killed, more people than on the Arizona, including 767 schoolchildren. I didn't see that mentioned anywhere.

The remainder of the day was fairly slow. I was hungry enough in the afternoon to take on Tony Roma's ribshack on Kalakaua Avenue, spent a while cloud/sunbathing by the pool at the hotel, and then embraced the American culture by going to a sports bar down the road and watching the New England Patriots win yet again, making it 13-0 so far and getting ever closer to the perfect season.

Day 4

Ever noticed how Hawaiian words have lots of vowels? Aloha. Hawaii. Kalakaua. Waikiki. Honolulu. And so on. That's because every word has to end in a vowel, and vowels make up almost half the letters in the Hawaiian alphabet. In full it's A,E,I,O,U,H,K,L,M,N,P,W. Also, if placed at the beginning of the word, W is W, but anywhere else it's pronounced V. So Hawaii should actually be pronounced Havaii. There you go.

At the far end of Kalakaua Avenue lies Diamond Head Crater, a distinctive peak in the landscape which today I would walk up. I donned by best walking boots - i.e. my trainers - and set off down Kalakaua Avenue with a purpose.

I picked a cracker of a day to walk up the crater. Although it was cloudy, it soon turned out to be a roaster with very little breeze around - the crater blocks it out. Typical. I'd anticipated a lonely hike up a grassy footpath followed by a solitary victory stance at the top with my arms spread out. And maybe someone filming me above, circling around with some dramatic music. I was in for a surprise.

You have to pay to get in. They've dug enormous holes through the crater for cars and buses to drive in and out. There are hot dog and burger shacks at the base. And it was heaving with tourists.

Sacrilegious.

Anyway, I paid the dollar entry fee and began the hike (after eating a hot dog). It was tough. The path isn't exactly smooth and the overnight rain made it a bit tricky in parts. And, just when you think you're getting there, you find enormous steep staircases greeting you round the corner. When I finally got to the top after a 30 minute climb I was covered in sweat, along with everyone else. Determined to get my energy's worth I stood there looking around for ages and took many photos before heading back down.

I have to say it was worth it alone to see the fat Americans gasping for air on the way up as I happily strolled back down. Thinking about it, I wouldn't be surprised if all the water on the path was actually their sweat.

Back down Kalakaua Avenue, past Waikiki Beach for a few more photos, then the bad weather came back again. It's 5pm here now, I'm off to get some food...

Day 5

I didn't sleep very well last night. A storm hit the island and left it in pieces; at one point I was sure it was centralised in my hotel room, with the wind caning the hotel and the rain lashing against the windows. I left the hotel to get some breakfast and discovered a mess outside. Huge palm tree leaves scattered all over the place, traffic cones spread over the road and little mini floods everywhere for the cars to drench the pedestrians with. The Chinese restaurant next door was 'closed due to bad weather', as were the two places up the road from that. I started to get worried but then found a place on the corner of Kalakau Avenue that would do me some expensive food. I settled down and watched the Honolulu Fire Department try and clear an enormous flooded area with what appeared to be nothing more sophisticated than a couple of sticks. Interesting. The water was still there when I went back to the hotel.

Since my initial trip down Kalakau Avenue I'd been thinking about hiring a car from the rental garage, and today was going to be the day for it, if at all. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have hired it even if there hadn't been a storm...

They had some very nice cars there denoted as 'exotic cars', such as a Dodge Viper that I particularly liked. But I had my eyes on a yellow Ford Mustang, an American muscle car that was reasonably priced at $55 for the day. I began chatting to the rental guy and asked him where the Mazda RX8 was, priced at $100 for the day.

'Over there.' he said, pointing at a crumpled heap in the corner with a sheet thrown over it. 'The guy was drift racing it near some cliffs. He walked away with a few scratches but is still paying for it now. Ha ha haaa..'. The demented laugh immediately told me I shouldn't be hiring one of these cars, no matter what the rental price.

By the way, there are 1.3 million people living in Hawaii. A more notable fact is that there are more cars than people, if you include the dealers and rental companies. Couple that with the fact that the road systems were designed to cope with 200,000 cars and you begin to understand how bad the traffic is. And don't get me started on the pedestrian crossing lights, you can grow a beard waiting for those to change.

That's a nice bit of filler for what was, all in all, a non-event of a day. Early morning flight again tomorrow...

Day 1

Bored and desperate to get out of the Jamaica area of New York, I took a cab from the hotel to the airport at 12pm and the plane duly took off ontime at 3:30pm. Unfortunately my dreams of a great flight were savaged by the realisation that internal American Airlines flights are...basic. Little room, no screen in front, and no free food or drinks (unless you want water). I also had the dubious pleasure of sitting next to a grumpy old bag who seemed particularly irritated by me asking her to move so I could take my seat by the window. With not much else to do I spent the majority of the 6 hour flight jostling with her for arm and leg position, and then clipped her ankle as she walked down the aisle getting off the plane. Oops.

It was rush hour in San Francisco and roadworks on the main road meant a rather expensive cab journey. Again. I arrived at my hotel to be childishly excited at the prospect of staying in a classic American motel with the rooms in clear sight above a small car park, with a little room at the front to check in. In other words, it was a hellhole.

After recovering from my shock at how good the actual room was inside, I ventured out onto Lombard Street and decided to complete my experience at a good old American Diner on Lombard Street where I ate burger and fries with a shake. Nice. Then it was off to bed for some seriously well-needed sleep, with a visit to the Golden Gate Bridge and whatever else I could squeeze in the next day.

Day 2

Well, the first thing to report is that San Francisco, or at least the majority of it, is nothing like New York.

It's hotter. It's hilly. There are no skyscrapers blocking the sun everywhere you go, and the temperature is more consistent as a result. When you leave your hotel you walk past people's homes, which are great, rather than endless eateries and shops. People don't constantly throw leaflets in your face. The streets are clean and also colourful at times. There are no sewage pipes or steaming drains spewing out a horrible stench. People talk rather than shout. Joggers and cyclists fill up their own dedicated lanes. Hardly anybody smokes. Couples chase their dogs around what seem to be an endless series of lush green parks. There are no hoodlums or menacing looking gangs on the corners of the streets. No-one tries to sell you drugs. Even the homeless, of which there are very few, don't beg and just politely stare at the ground. Solitary people stand on the sidewalks doing bizarre exercises without fear of being mocked. Even the lunatics who speak unknown languages are smiley and somehow approachable.

I found it all very disturbing.

Anyway, I set off in the morning down towards the bay, without checking my map first which was a bit foolhardy, and then turned east to go to Fisherman's Wharf. I shouldn't have done this as I hate the smell of fish, but it comes recommended. Unsurprisingly it stank of fish, and I turned back around and walked all the way back towards the Golden Gate Bridge.

No matter how far I seemed to walk, the bridge never got any closer. Endless paths, roads and turns, yet still it looked the same (long) distance away. Finally, after a few stops to adjust my shoes and socks, I arrived at the base of the bridge to find the footpath up to it was closed. For my own safety apparently. Bugger. I turned back and walked half a mile the other way and then took a painfully steep footpath up to the top. After almost two hours of uncomfortable walking I'd reached my destination, all hot and sweaty and bothered.

The bridge is spectacular, no doubt about it. The cables used to make it can wrap the earth 3 times over. I've no idea how you'd begin to build any bridge, let alone one that size and scale - it's really something to behold. I strolled along it for a while and soon came to the disappointing realisation that there really wasn't much else to do on it. I stopped, took a few pictures, then a deep breath and headed back to Lombard Street.

Back at the hotel I took off my shoes to reveal a blister on my left foot over an inch in diameter. Nice. I rested my weary limbs for a while and then hobbled out for some food and a few drinks, then hobbled back for a busy one the next day.

Day 3

I'd pre-booked a bus trip round the city centre, so I strolled down to Fisherman's Wharf again (an hour from my hotel), ate an omelette and all the crap that comes with it in America,and then hopped on board.

It was excellent, a very complete and informative tour that was brilliantly narrated by a sarcastic, droll Californian. My favourite bit - 'And here on the left is the Indonesian Passport Office, which is very handy indeed. You never know when you might need that'. Having had my fill of the city centre I went down to Pier 33 to complete my excursions with a trip to Alcatraz.

Alcatraz was as good as I'd hoped, but no more (let's not go overboard, it is after all an empty building on an island). Little plaques everywhere you go give intriguing bits of information, and the audio tour of the main prison is very well done, featuring real ex officers and prisoners. I'm sure everyone knows all about Alcatraz so I'll leave it there...if you've been to San Francisco and didn't to the trip, you missed out.

It's now 6pm in San Francisco and I'm soon off to get some food before getting up early to fly to Hawaii. Next update will be from Honolulu...

Day 1

After a very welcome meet with some old Sheffield Uni bods on Thursday night (cheers chaps) I took the dreaded tube journey to Heathrow which was, of course, a nightmare with my luggage. Got there with plenty of time to spare and soon wished that I hadn't as there was no plane at the departure gate. After a delay of just over an hour we finally boarded and then sat for another hour whilst they tried to work out why they had extra luggage on board. Finally we set off, then had to head back when they realised they'd repacked the luggage incorrectly. Nice one BA.

Eventually arrived in New York well behind schedule and met a very patient Mik at my terminal. Both absolutely knackered, we took a bus to the hotel at the Rockefeller Centre, wandered into a bar to get some food and a few beers, and then hit the sack ready for a day of strolling around Manhatten on Saturday...

Day 2

Despite being shattered the night before, the 5 hour difference still took its toll and we were awake by about 6am, still really tired. Even so we took in a lot in New York on the Saturday - strolled through Times Square, checked out the bus terminal in advance of the Giants game, went to Grand Central Station, up to Central Park where we went through the zoo, and then all the way up to the Natural History Museum where the highlight was definitely a panoramic film of the galaxy which left me with a crick in my neck. We then made our way back to midtown via St Patrick's Cathedral, which is spectacular inside, and sat by the ice rink on 42nd street drinking hot apple cider and made a note to come back and drink it again.

Still shattered from a long and VERY cold day, we went back to the hotel for showers and then back out for a bite to eat and a few drinks, then bed again hoping to feel more awake the next day.

Day 3

After breakfast we went to the bus terminal, got lost inside it for half an hour and then finally some kind soul put us out of our misery and told us where we needed to go to get the bus to the Giants stadium.

Outside the stadium was ace, loads of private Giants branded pick-up trucks and RVs with barbeques cooking what appeared to be whole animals and big fat Americans swilling budweiser in the seats. They take going to a game seriously, they don't mess about.

The game was nothing short of a disaster for the Giants, they punted the ball straight out of touch at the beginning and the Vikings scored a touch down on their 2nd down with about 15 seconds on the clock. Quarterback Eli Manning had a 'mare, giving away 4 interceptions from which the Vikings scored 3 touchdowns directly. Lots of boos, lots of people leaving early, and some guy to our left was encouraging his kids to sing 'Eli is adopted' which I didn't particularly like, although Mik did point out that Manning's dad and brother were both top NFL players.

After the game we walked past a HUGE queue and laughed, and then stopped laughing when we realised it was the queue for the buses which we needed to join. We trapsed what seemed like miles to the back of the queue and tried to guess how many hours it would take to get back, but it wasn't too bad and we were back by 6pm for more hot apple cider. Then the usual routine of getting some food, drinks in a bar and then asleep by midnight wondering if we'd ever stop feeling so tired.

Day 4

Monday was, as described by the weather forecast on TV, a Soaker. Low clouds and foggy, intermittent rain, but slightly warmer than it had been before. I decided the Empire State Building would be rubbish and so we got the subway down to Wall Street and walked to Battery Park to get a ferry out to the Statue of Liberty.

Through what can only be described as sheer laziness we decided to get a yellow New York cab style ferry instead of joining what appeared to be the rest of the world on the official ferry tour. After debating which side of the ferry would be best we boarded it when it arrived and discovered it was just us two and 4 Japanese tourists on board - excellent.

The tour was good, Kathleen Turner (?) told us all about each part of the tour and then things went a little pear shaped when the wind picked up and the rain lashed into our faces. I took a rubbish picture of the Brooklyn Bridge through the driving rain and then we were told to go back inside the boat because of the weather, which wasn't disappointing at all. We decided to get off the boat early and head up to Little Italy and Chinatown.

Both of these were as expected - lots of little shops and eateries, and lots of very slow moving people to navigate around. We made use of the tour book I brought and hunted down Lombardi's restaurant which was recommended as the top cheap eat in New York. And it was excellent. Stuffed, we wandered around for a while then got the subway back to Grand Central Station.

Monday night was a bit different as we went to a bar with some people from Vegas and got drunk on a mixture of beer, cider, vodka and black sambuca and, to demonstrate my drunkenness, I took issue with a huge 7 foot dude outside who was trying to sell me coke and also trying to convince me it was a good idea to put in my sock and take it with me on my flight. Not finished there, I had another pop at him in the street when I saw him again later. Good work. I woke up in the morning with a bit of a hangover but also quite glad to be alive.

Day 5

Not too much to report. We floated around with those tired types of hangovers, then at 3:30pm tried to flag down a taxi to JFK airport to drop Mik off and then take me to my hotel nearby. This was a very unsuccessful mission and so we got the hotel to book us a cab, which hilariously turned out to be a stretched limo. With hindsight this was a decent move as the traffic was hideous and we got to the airport just before 5pm, giving Mik about 15 minutes to check in. I haven't heard otherwise so I assume he made it!!

Then it was onto Queens for me, in particular Jamaica Boulevard. The cab ended up costing about 40 pounds for just over an hour and a half's journey - not great but a yellow cab would have been about the same with the traffic.

I'm not surprised that Jamaica didn't make it into my Top 10 New York guide. It's a dump. I checked into the hotel, which was perfectly reasonable, and then strolled down the main boulevard, cold and tired, looking for something to eat. Fearing for my life, and struggling against the icy winds, I duly noted the various Chinese takeaways which I didn't think I'd survive through and then broke a long-standing promise by doubling back and entering the MacDonalds opposite the hotel which I'd earlier ignored. A quick drink in the hotel and then it was off to sleep in what seemed at the time to be the comfiest bed in the world, dreaming about a fantastically comfortable flight to San Francisco sitting next to a gorgeous babe with unlimited food and drink and an onboard entertainment system...